Bad Days?

I have never been good with change or the most flexible person in the world. The flesh in which I am still encased in still pulls towards sinful behaviors and attitudes that are rooted in my desire to have control. I see the manifestations of this in my anxious or worried heart, my frustration when things don't go as planned, and my emotions when I am left without answers of what to do in a specific situation.  

I have written on this subject many, many times. My life is marked by sanctification in this area as the Lord graciously provides me with countless opportunities to grow.  The dependence I have upon Him, although never changing, becomes more clear in moments when I am humbled to remember that HE is in control, and always is.  

Through these times when I am forced to recognize my lack of control, I find myself reminded of the fact that my life is far more blessed than I deserve.  The small trials that I face are tiny compared to the trials that many of my brothers and sisters in Him are enduring and have endured.  From my perspective, days can appear as "bad", in fact there are many times my husband asks me how my day has been and despite all the good in that day, I seem to find that the "bad" has outweighed what has been SO good.

I recently came across a familiar passage in Scripture that has given me a new perspective, and what I believe is the right perspective on "bad" days. 

"Therefore we do not lose heart, but though our outer man is decaying, yet our inner man is being renewed day by day. For momentary, light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory far beyond all comparison, while we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen; for the things which are seen are temporal, but the things which are not seen are eternal." -2 Corinthians 4:16-18

For the Christian, there is no such thing as a "bad" day.  Are there hard days? Yes. Are there painful days? Yes. But there are no "bad" days. For the Christian we can rest in knowing that each day has been purposefully designed by the hand of the Almighty God. We can believe that as hard as it might be, there is good intended and there is glory being achieved. We can cling to the promise of this passage by recognizing that our affliction, no matter how great or how small it is here on earth, is momentary and light compared to what we have in store for us in the kingdom.  There is not a moment of suffering here that is eternal--thanks to the blood of Christ; all is temporal, and fading, bringing us closer with each tear and each day, to our Savior.  

If we truly believe that God IS sovereign over all, that He IS good, that He IS faithful, and that His ways ARE better, then there can never be a "bad" day for the believer.  We must resolve to change our thinking, and to keep our eyes fixed on the eternal in order to have this perspective. Our days must be seen as purposefully preparing us for perfection! What an amazing Truth to think on, and what a good Father we have. 

8!

Our sweet boy is officially 8 months old...8 MONTHS!  I can't believe how fast time flies, it feels like I was just holding my 7lb1oz little bundle of joy, but at the same time, I feel like he has been with us forever.  He truly is such a blessing to each of us every single day. There are so many reasons why this is the case, but mostly because he is the greatest tool the Lord is using to sanctify us!

I think he is slowing down in the physical growth department.  He gained a little bit in height this month but stayed the same in weight.  I'm okay with that, the longer he stays little is ok with me!

He is trying SO hard to move, it is so cute to watch.  He rolls everywhere, moves backwards, and from side to side, but because he hasn't quite figured out how to lift that cute little chubby body up on his hands and knees he can't move forward.  He lunges forward onto his hands and knees but then flops down onto his belly. Soon I'm sure, but until that, I will enjoy him not moving like crazy because once he is crawling I know he won't sit still.

He has started clapping and in the last week he has starting waving, but he is just learning this new skill so we don't get too many waves out of him just yet.  These two things are just about the cutest things I have ever seen.  Every night when we sing worship songs he will clap along and he often claps for himself when he is excited, TOO CUTE!  And he knows what "clap" means so when we ask him to clap he usually will! Below is a picture of him clapping-hence why it is so blurry.

He talks ALL THE TIME, I think he loves hearing his own voice.  "Dada" is his favorite word, of course.  He knows sign language for eat and please, although he can't do it, he recognizes it when we ask him.  And he knows to wait until we pray for his food before he is going to eat.

He is such a happy boy, I love the hundreds of smiles and all the giggles we get to enjoy each day.

He loves music, balls, blocks, bubbles, baths and animals.  And he LOVES to stand.  Maybe he will skip crawling all together and go straight to walking.  He can't pull himself up but he can stand by himself holding onto things for a bit (he gets super excited when he does this), and then he looses his balance and comes tumbling down.

He eats VERY well, although he did reject his first food this month...Green Beans (but come'on who likes green beans anyway?!).  He does get his greens mixed in with other foods, good thing he doesn't know ;).  And he loves feeding himself puffs or cut up fruits and veggies, it is adorable....everything about him is!

Drinking out of a straw has become his new favorite fascination.  But although he has a few cups with straws, he prefers to drink out of mommy or daddy's big straws, even if that means getting soaked in the process.

We took him to the beach a few weeks ago for the first time and lets just say it wasn't his most favorite place ;).  

He is a definite mama's boy, but I so adore that.  He still loves hugs and kisses and snuggling in bed with mommy and daddy!  And he loves snuggling with his little lambie and monkey in bed, SO ADORABLE!

He has 3 teeth (all on the bottom) and a couple more (on the top) on the way...those top teeth just take forever to pop through.  His teeth are so cute, but getting them sure isn't any fun!

8 months young, and so much fun...Brayden we love you and pray every single day that God would use you and your little life for His glory!

Faithful in the Little Things

A few months before Keith and I got married, our Pastor, Philip DeCourcy, welcomed us into his home and shared a verse, along with some wisdom, that I will never forget:

"Catch the foxes--the little foxes that spoil the vines, for our vines have tender grapes!"

- Song of Solomon 2:15

As he encouraged us to watch the little things in our life that evening, I was challenged in new ways.  I recognized that it was often the little things in life that get neglected (both good and bad), and those little things are the stepping stones that lead to the big things.

Most of us will rarely be faced with BIG things, our life is made up of little things, the day to day.  And it is those little things that are MOST important.  It is in the little things that we are called to be faithful.  The little things lay the foundations for great kingdom work and the little things can also lay the foundation for heinous sin.  Just as the old saying goes, "Rome wasn't built in a day", so it is in the Christian life; sanctification doesn't happen in a day and neither does a great fall.

As a mom, I have been learning more than ever that LITTLE things matter. I am not going to see fruit every single day, in fact I may not see the fruit of my labor for years, BUT, I am called to be faithful, and that I must be, every. single. day., in the big things, and in the small (which is most of our realities).  I pray for that faithful heart, and trust the Lord to continue to work.

"Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much, and whoever is dishonest with very little will also be dishonest with much." -Luke 16:10

 

7 Months And Counting...

7 months have come and gone...QUICKLY! I cannot believe how much has changed in the last 7 months, and even more so, how much little B has changed.  He has went from this newborn who didn't make too much noise to a baby with a ton of personality!  It is SO much fun living life with him, for both Keith and I, and every day seems like a new adventure as we get to experience everything he does for the first time.  To say we are blessed to get to be his parents is an understatement.  Thank you Jesus for this precious little man you've entrusted to us, we are forever grateful.

So what is he up to now?  Well, he is moving, not crawling, but he can and does move from left to right and backwards (kicking his legs and moving his arms).  He hasn't quite figured out how to lift his midsection yet.  He still would prefer to just roll over from tummy to back, so I don't know how interested in crawling he is at the moment.  I think he has figured out that we will give him his toys and the same amount of attention whether he is on his tummy or his back, and lets face it, laying down on his back is much easier ;), little stinker.  He will get there, eventually, so until then, we are enjoying not having to worry about him getting into everything.  He does love to stand though, so maybe he will end up bypassing crawling and go straight to walking...lets hope not! ;)

He has his two bottom teeth (they are absolutely adorable), and is working on getting a few of the top.  Teething is NOT FUN for anyone, poor little guy.  In fact he is teething at the moment, hence why getting a good 7 month picture wasn't too easy.  These top ones are causing a lot more pain then the bottom did, that's for sure.  But he is loving experimenting with "chewing", it is so funny to watch him chew and feel out his new teeth.

He still is a great eater, and is enjoying more and more solids.  Textures and tastes don't seem to bother him as he has not rejected anything we've offered. This month we will try some more green veggies so maybe we will get a different reaction?!  He has started picking up 'puffs' and eating those, it is pretty cute to watch him feed himself!

He LOVES his mommy and his daddy so very much.  He lights up when one of us walks in the room. I will leave the room for a minute to grab something and as soon as I come back and he sees me, he gets this bashful smile on his face, it melts my heart, every. single. time.  His smiles and laughs are the highlights of our days.  And he has just started burying his head in our shoulder or our chest as if he is hugging us, it is such a precious moment each time he does it.

He has become more and more aware of "strangers" and isn't as quick to give someone a smile without first checking mommy's face to see how she reacts. 

He still enjoys books, music, and dancing (with mommy and daddy of course). And he loves, loves, LOVES being thrown up in the air and caught.

We spend a good amount of time outside each day on a blanket or taking a walk...these are most definitely his favorite parts of the day.

He has graduated from the ERGO (although he still rides in it occasionally) to the cart at the store and he sure loves sitting like a big boy!

He said "dada" this month, he obviously doesn't know what that means, but Keith was pretty happy :).  He talks quite a bit, especially when he is alone in his crib...it is pretty funny to watch on the monitor.

He is very aware of EVERYTHING going on around him, he just takes it all in.  He loves water, baths, the pool, or even being squirt with a spray bottle :).

He is growing healthy and strong and we are enjoying every moment with him!  Happy 7 months sweet boy!

Truth Must Inform Your Heart

I recently overheard some moms chatting about what they had "given up" to be stay at home moms with their kids, and how "purposeless" their lives were now.  They complained about their lack of freedom, their inability to shop for the latest trends in fashion and home decor, and how they were no longer considered "successful".  They gabbed on about how ordinary their days were, and how boring.  About two minutes into the conversation I knew that our perspectives were very different, or so I hoped.  Afterwards, I thought long and hard about what I had just heard, and began to examine my own thoughts, motives, and heart with regards to being a wife and a mom.  Do I see what I do as a "have to" or a "get to"?  Have I "given up" my hopes, dreams and aspirations to sit at home all day?  Am I no longer "free"? And do I find myself seeing my days as ordinary?  Have I become "unsuccessful"?

I began to realize that although my perspective (because I know the Truth) is very different, there are attitudes at times, in my heart, that reflect those very ideas that these women were sharing. 

If someone asked me what I wanted to from the time I was 5 on, I would have answered the same...a wife and a mom, that is all I want to do.  I had dreams and aspirations, yes, but they were always wrapped around this idea that I would be a stay at home wife and mom.  I would dream often about what it would be like, and prayed and prayed for those dreams to become reality.  So here I am, 26 years old, and living that "dream".  Is it everything I chalked it up to be?  Is it a dream come true?  That was the question I asked myself after listening to these women.  And in my heart there was an instant, YES.  I began to realize in that moment, how blessed and thankful I truly am.  And how my perspective (aka TRUTH) must shape the attitude of my heart in every situation, even on those hard days when I'm running on little sleep, the house is a mess, and I feel like I don't know what I am doing as a mom. 

These ideas popped into my head after thinking about my roles as a wife, and a mom...

You GET TO Be A Wife and a Mom
 So often, as wives and moms, well I guess as humans, our perspective shifts from the "get to" to the "have to".  We "have to" go to church, to pick up our kids from soccer, to the grocery store etc.  But Truth has gone awry when we begin to think in such a way.  We must remember that we "get to" do so many of these things, by the grace of God.  We deserve absolutely NOTHING good, in fact, we deserve hell, and separation from the Lord, BUT God, in His love and mercy saved us (as believers) and has blessed us above and beyond that salvation.  So when we are tempted to think, "I have to clean my house", or "I have to make dinner", or I have to...you fill in the blank; change that to "I get to!", and remember the abundance of grace bestowed upon you.

The Mundane IS Kingdom Work
Let's face it, as a mother and a wife, our days are pretty ordinary.  We wake up, make breakfast, play with our kids, clean up spills, potty train, take our children to school, discipline, clean the house, nurse our babies, help with homework, run errands, walk to the park, and the list goes on.  Nothing "special" might happen on an ordinary day, or so we may be tempted to think.  But the reality is, every day we are doing kingdom work.  Every dish done, story read, meal made, and prayer prayed is all part of God's perfectly designed plan to bring Him glory.  Nothing goes unnoticed, or unrewarded for that matter (when it is done with a heart as unto the Lord). Our home isn't here, we are simply passing through, with a greater kingdom on the other side!

Everyday is Purposed and Designed
Nothing happens by chance.  If your 8 month old decided to stay up all night crying,  your three year old spilled a gallon of milk on the floor, or your teenager lost their cell phone at school, you can rest in knowing that it is all part of His perfect plan.  Sin sets things awry, from our perspective, but the Truth is, God purposes good out of even what is evil.  We can know that He is working in our everyday life with an end goal in sight- our Christ likeness and His glory.  There is nothing that happens on any ordinary day that isn't designed by the hand of the Father.  So when you are discouraged, remember that Truth, and find peace.

Little Eyes Help Us SEE
Enjoy the little eyes in your life and SEE His glory and beauty through them.  The way an infant stares at your face for hours everyday, the way a one year old finds the wind simply wonderful, the way a five year old looks at the ocean and can't believe its splendor, or how a ten year old stands amazed at the first snow fall they've ever seen...these are all glimpses of His glory that we get to experience, again, through the eyes of the little ones in our life. 

So when, and if you are tempted, as a mother and wife, to see your role and duties as simple, purposeless, ordinary, or worse, unenjoyable, STOP and REMEMBER TRUTH, and let that inform your heart.

 

Six Things

It has been just about 6 1/2 months since we brought home our little treasure and the joy we have experienced is unexplainable.  It is hard to remember what life was like without this little baby; he has taught us so much about ourselves and more importantly the Lord, and has been an ever present reminder of God's goodness, faithfulness, grace and love towards us.  Here are six things I have learned from being Brayden's mommy.

1. YOU'RE NOT IN CONTROL: God teaches me this over and over again, in different ways each day.  He reminds me, gracioulsy, as I raise Brayden, that He is the one sovereign over all things, and He is the one who calls all the shots.  I am always fully dependent upon Him for all things, and it is only His grace that sustains me each and every day.

 2. HIS MERCIES ARE NEW EVERY DAY: No matter what my day was like, how much I failed, or how hard it may have been, tomorrow is a new day, full of NEW mercy and grace as the Lord graciously reminds me of the Gospel.

3. TREASURE EVERY MOMENT: "Kids grow fast", I hear it all the time, and the fact of the matter is, it's true.  I know Brayden's only 6 months, but I know that in the blink of an eye he will be walking down the aisle on his wedding day.  The Lord has taught me to be still, to stop, and to enjoy every moment with this sweet treasure for we don't know which moment will be our last, and time is fading. 

 4. I MARRIED AN AMAZING DADDY: Watching Keith with Brayden has been incredible.  There is nothing more wonderful then seeing your spouse with your child.  I have grown to love Keith more deeply as I see him as a father.  He is such a faithful provider and protector and for that I am beyond grateful.

 5. YOU'RE CHILD IS UNIQUE: God designs each child uniquely, they are an individual who He has created with purpose and for a unique plan.  There is no formula or book that can tell you how to parent your child-take advice and wisdom with a grain of salt and seek the Lord as He directs you in parenting your kiddo.

6. I CAN NEVER PRAY TOO MUCH: Pray, pray and then pray some more.  I need it, it is vital to my everyday living just as much as breathing is.  We are dependent on the Lord, we need His grace, we need to be in constant fellowship with Him, ALL DAY LONG. 

Best 6 months of my life by far, and the most sanctifying.  I love you little B, thank you for teaching me to love Jesus more.

Half a Year!

I know I always say this, but I can't believe how fast time flies and how fast little ones grow! Brayden is officially 6 months old, half a year!

 Just standing up :)

 See my tooth?

This little man steals our hearts daily and is often used to remind us of how great our God is.  It is amazing to watch him experience life, to stand in awe of something as simple as a tree blowing in the wind...God's little reminders of His beauty and awesomeness seen through the eyes of a 6 month old.

Brayden got his first tooth about 2 weeks ago and is currently getting his second one.  Teething is no fun!  Poor kiddo.  Thank the Lord for frozen bananas, washcloths, teething tablets, and this little raspberry.

He loves hearing himself talk and scream and is pretty sure mommy and daddy love to hear it too.  He has so much to say, it is so darn adorable to listen to him as he tries so hard to chat with us.  And the screaming is cute too...for now ;).

Tummy time has become more enjoyable as the days go by and he is just starting to move himself from side to side as he reaches for toys.  He finally figured the art of rolling from back to tummy (it is hard work when you are a big boy!). He wants to move SO badly, soon my sweet little boy, soon.

He has enjoyed every solid we have tried, but his favorites are white sweet potatoes, carrots, pears and HE LOVES bananas; I'm not surprised, anything sweet...lets hope he doesn't have mommy's sweet tooth!  And straws, he is obsessed with straws.  Anytime we are drinking out of one or if there is one in the room, he spots it and reaches for it, and asks for it (in his baby way of course).  He hasn't quite figured out how to drink from it, thank goodness, but they must be soothing to his little gums; that or he just wants to be like mommy and daddy.

Keith and I went away for our anniversary and brought our little man with us! Brayden went on his first plane flight, and vacation, and had a blast!  He did great on the plane and loved all the little places in the San Francisco area we visited, especially Muir Woods (trees are a favorite of his).

He still loves books, music/singing, and his little jumper.  But his favorite toy, that always puts a smile on his face, is his little doggy.  It is SO cute to watch him with his "friend".

A lot of his toys have buttons to push and things to spin to turn on sounds/lights, and he loves pushing/spinning them.  He has a little aquarium in his crib and we often hear him turning it on and off, sometimes in the middle of the night ;).

I used to watch this little guy when he was a little bigger than Brayden for a couple years, and he gets to come play with us every once in a while! Brayden loves his little friend Austin, and Austin adores Brayden-don't be fooled by their seriousness ;).

He still loves being held, and lets us know too!  We cherish our sweet moments with him in our arms because we know they won't last for long.

What a blessed half of a year we have had with our sweetness.  Mommy and Daddy have learned to depend on the Lord more than ever, and have been sweetly reminded of His precious grace every day through your little life Brayden.  We are so thankful for you and the time we have had with you thus far, we pray we get many more half birthdays, and real birthdays with you little peanut.  We love you to the moon, and back!

Just for fun...look how much he has grown in 6 months!