"Training" Up A Child

I have been consumed lately, not in a bad way, with the thought of parenting.  The little baby we brought home from the hospital 10 1/2 months ago isn't quite so little anymore. His sin nature is manifesting itself, and as our pastor reminded us of recently in a sermon he preached, your child is not a son of God, and therefore they are wicked.  That is hard to grasp on a daily basis, even when you see their sinfulness.  But the reality is that it is true, and because our children are little sinners, and in need of redemption, we must view them as God does, unsaved.

In our society, even among Christian parents, there is this emphasis on raising good kids. However we can modify their behavior to get them to be good, seems to be the goal of many parents.  After all, we don't want to be those parents in the store who have the three year old wailing on the floor because he wants a box of cookies, or the parents of the kid at the restaurant who throws food at guests nearby.  We want kids who are obedient, well mannered, and basically, good.  

The problem is, having a good kid, CANNOT be the Christian parents goal.  Although there are manners that need to be taught, appropriate behaviors that must be learned, and social norms that our children will be schooled in, if we don't address the fundamental problem, the heart, we have failed to be faithful to our duty as their parents.  The Bible says in Jeremiah 17:9 that "the heart is wicked above all else...". Our children's hearts are wicked, and in order for them to see their need for the Savior we so love, they must see their sin, and the wickedness of their very hearts.  

But how on earth do we go about doing this? Especially in a culture that promotes self esteem, how am I as a parent supposed to teach and train my child that their hearts are wicked, that they are innately sinful and bad and that only Christ can make them good? I have been thinking, praying and reading and have been burdened with this task. Although it is by the grace of God ALONE that my children will ever come to faith, there is still a heavy responsibility that I bear, as a mother, to train them, to point them towards Jesus, and to equip them with the tools that I pray the Lord will use to draw them to himself.

PRAY: It starts on our knees. Only in Him can we find the strength, the wisdom, and the grace to train up and disciple these little ones HE has entrusted to us. There are countless verses in Scripture we can spend time praying for our children.  Here are just a few:
Pray that Jesus will CALL them and nobody will hinder them from coming: "Then children were brought to him that he might lay his hands on them and pray. The disciples rebuked the people, but Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven.” And he laid his hands on them and went away. "(Matthew 19:13–15)

Pray they will respond to the persistent call of Christ: "The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance." (2 Peter 3:9)

Pray they will be sanctified by the work of the Spirit: "And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” (Matthew 22:37-39)

Pray for their purity: "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things." (Philippians 4:8)

(Taken from: http://www.desiringgod.org/blog/posts/seven-things-to-pray-for-your-children)

DISCIPLINE: This isn't one many moms, or dads, are most excited about, but it is fundamental to training up our children.  We can't get around the Biblical principle of discipline, and I would even go further and say spanking.  Proverbs 22:15 says, "Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child;The rod of discipline will remove it far from him."

TEACH: There are teachable moments all throughout our days.  Whether it be at the park, in the kitchen, or during a dispute between siblings; the Lord calls us to make the most of every opportunity and we must be on the watch for these moments each and every day, always creatively thinking how we can incorporate Truth, and the Gospel in real life.
Proverbs 22:6 "Train up a child in the way he should go,Even when he is old he will not depart from it."
2 Timothy 3:14-15 "But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have firmly believed, knowing from whom you learned it and how from childhood you have been acquainted with the sacred writings, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus."

SHOW: We have to set the example, we have to be the role models.  If our children see us with repentant hearts, they see the Gospel in action, and our need for Jesus too.  If our children see our Bibles open throughout the day, their curiosity will be heightened. If our children hear our prayers, they too will learn how to talk to Jesus.  We have to lead them by example, in real every day life.  And I truly believe when they see us as we really are, still being sanctified, they will see Jesus as even more glorious.
1 Corinthians 10:32 "Be imitators of me, just as I also am of Christ."

These are just some of the ways I have been encouraged to grow in on this journey of parenting.  My little one may only be 10 months, but I am certain that our call to train them up starts from birth and my prayer is that I would be a vessel that the Lord uses to bring them to Him.